Episode 11: Merry Useless Lesbians and a Happy Suplex For All!

[fallers_npcs]

In the stillness of evening
Nothing was stirring
not even a Ratata
Or a Togedemaru for sure
When out of the shadows
I hear but a clatter
I sprang to the roof
to see what was the matter...


December 13 to 18 Prompts 1 to 3
Prompt 1
Today, you might notice a headline on the front page as a photograph is shown. Of a distinct Sleigh in the night skies, and two figures: one slender, one burly. And the title: "SANTA CAME EARLY THIS YEAR! SLEIGH CRASHLANDED IN THE MIDDLE OF MELEMELE FOREST!"


Prompt 2: Amelie the Christmas Granddaughter
The next day, there’s a young girl with a face some people might find familiar wandering around the island, wearing a Santa-themed dress and carrying a strange device that continually beeps and flashes. She’s not shy about sticking it directly in people’s faces, either.


Prompt 3: Sasha the Christmas Incineroar
Along with the young girl, one might find a Christmas Incineroar stalking about the island, looking like she is attending to the well wishers, with passing presents from a big sack, rounding up kids and falling Fallers, and other such interactions. She is also often seen with the young girl who is shoving her beeping device into people's faces. Any trouble makers are instantly Christmas Suplexed and leaves Candy Coal for the Bad Boys and Girls.


December 18: The Crashlanding

And then suddenly without warning
With a crash and a bash and a smash
Naughty Viren took advantage of Santa
And stole his Sleigh, for a Commercial and that's bad

Prompt 4: The Christmas Grinch Viren *Event Prompt Beings On the 16th*

It seems that the massive cause of the Christmas Cheer being so poor right now, is Viren commercializing Santa to the skeptical Fallers who have been more than willing to go along with his nonsense. He is ready to take Santa's Sleigh, and take over the Toy Factory, all of his Delibirds, and force him to sign a contract to build a big golden statue of himself in the North Pole! You gotta stop him!

Comments

Prompt 4: The Christmas Grinch Viren

[fallers_npcs]

If it wasn't apparent by now, the source of the Christmas Grinchery was a combination of several things.

The first was that many of the Fallers, several of the imports just didn't believe in Santa. This was swiftly being corrected with many witness accounts, stories and evidence being produced that this world's Santa was very much real.

But there was also a massive high amount of lack of Christmas Cheer from a large amount of people, even those who believed. And thus, Santa's helpers, namely Sasha the Holiday Incineroar and his granddaughter Amelie Claus were on the case, to get this settled before the flight on Christmas Eve.

To this end, everyone needed to help correct the most grievous of economic distress: the massive twelve foot golden statue of Viren Big Santa Bargains, and the over commercialization of the gaudy, tacky, money-apocalypse that Viren had put up in the last month and was selling massive amounts of cheap inexpensive toys at a cost to drive up the most amounts of profit possible to line his pockets.

Because the only person who needed a good Christmas was him.

As such, Viren was laughing in his store, waving his obnoxious fans. "Come in, and buy, buy, buy! Santa never gave me presents, so why shouldn't you buy?!"

Tacky and gross.

[blue_ice]

Kaiba swerved in front of the store and skidded to a stop in front of the statue on his brand new motorcycle, where he looked at the statue with unbridled disdain. Geez, and people accused him of being a vain showoff. This took the cake.

He strode inside confidently, giving the man an aside glance.

"Look, I probably understand better than most of the others that holiday shopping is a key source of profit for a retail-focused company. Whipping your followers into a shopping frenzy ensures success, and with careful planning and market research you can make your mark even with heavy competition. But your sloppy attempt at a timely monopoly is threatening the...m...."

He flinched. OH, he hated saying that word.

"The joy of the season for everyone, and I'm not letting a bunch of kids have their spirits crushed on Christmas morning because Santa couldn't bring them their gifts," he finished with an embarrassed huff.

[withoutcontrolofmyself]

Wes pulls up on his own motorcycle and frowns. God, what is with the Pokemon world and egomaniacs? It was the same in all versions of reality, huh?

Admittedly, Wes still doesn't get Christmas and Santa and all that sort of thing. But he's trying. He understands this man is bad and he's doing something wrong though. Wes understands this man is doing something that directly hurts kids in the future, which honestly gives him more than enough incentive to follow after Kaiba and walk up to Viren.

"You can't punch him though. That defeats the point," Wes' Rotomdex says as the man walks up behind Kaiba. Honestly, it's unclear whether or not Wes is listening to that thing. He's very good at ignoring it, so it seems.

"Just because you were hurt doesn't mean you should hurt others," Wes growls to Viren.

[revolutionhawk]

Well, this looks like a situation waiting to get extremely tense at a single false move from anyone. Holiday cheer isn't very contagious at all for Shay, but those that really know him would easily understand why.

But right now he's focusing with being on the job and just observing, freelancer police badge tucked inside his coat.

[fallers_npcs]

"Hmph, I'm just spreading some Christmas Cheer," sneered Viren. "Namely my own! If profits go up, then my own happiness goes up! Each year, Santa brings me coal, and I figured, if I make the most grinchiest Christmas in the world, then I'll be showered in coal! I'll get the most profit in both ways!"

He grinned, waving his fans in his most disgusting grin possible. "First I'll milk these disbelievers for money and give them the presents Santa's obviously not going to give them cause they're not going to write letters. What chumps. And then I'm gonna get all the coal in the world cause I've been rocketed right to the top of the Naughty List! Imagine! The biggest lump of coal possible, which I'll use Pokemon to compress into a giant diamond! And then I'll have it carved into an immortal statue of ME!"

Gross.

[nothing_can_stop_me]

Della... was is completely disbelief. There was literally someone this petty who would ruin Christmas for everyone because he couldn't be good.

"Wow, I've heard petty, but you make Glomgold look like a saint!" Della said, shocked. "You're actually willing..." Face palm, calm down, try to think.

"Look, I've seen those with a lot of money. Money doesn't make anyone happy. It's fleeting. It's family that matters! Believe me, I'm family to the Richest Duck in the World and he gets miserable when he loses his family and is left with money." Ponders for a bit. "Had one of my sons go through that, too."

[luckydragonsfoot]

"Heh! Didn' know ye had it in y', Kaiba!" He's grinning ear to ear as he says that- and he's apparently not alone, not that he actually arrived with her. Yuume as well stands there, still in her pink poncho.

"At the very least, we've had enough proof that this is a very real problem," she begins, looking at Viren with relative disgust. "...And proof enough that there Is no family for him to get miserable over. 'Punching' may be out of the question," Yuume continues. But... "But..."

She glances at Katsuya's ponyta- and Katsuya does as well.

He's got an idea! "Hehehe...you wanna play y' hand at bein' grinch? Y' gotta get ready for Chrism's itself t' come back your way!" Whatever that means anyway. "Kaseri..!"

"NnnNNIHIHIHI!" The ponyta's horn glows- and as it does, it seems she's trying to levitate and restrain the nasty fellow before them with psychic power. Good luck to making it work, but maybe everyone else can help? Except...

Wait- "NYHHH- NO, NO NOT THA', THIS AIN'T A FIGHT!!" Well Shit.

[hashtagparkerluck]

Viren's been on Peter's shit list for sometime now, He knows the man's shady and probably laundering money because when are these types not doing that? And while he's not the most excited about Christmas due to his own personal issues he doesn't think that's any reason to ruin the holiday for anyone else.

So, Spider-Man makes his appearance, Shelob nearby and both chilling on the wall. He lets go of the wall and flips down to the ground, landing in his usual Spider-like crouch.

"Okay Mr Bond Villain, that's just so extra I don't even know where to start." He criticizes before firing a quick web at Viren, he'd meant to yank the man away from the attack but instead, somehow, he ends up caught in the attack too.

Well.

This sure isn't... ideal.

[inadvertentdadfigure]

"You know kid, this is really the best way to get in touch with your Christmas side, giving someone a nice bear hug," called out a familiar voice from the side. Tony's loaded with shopping gifts, NOT from the Bargain Store, but at least he's got a bunch of gifts with Golurk for everyone and a big jaunty santa hat perched on his head with a giant teddy bear for Jenny.

"Cupcake," he called out addressing Jou. "You might wanna put pinky in a Pokeball y'know. Hey Viren, how's the roof?"

"STAAAAARK!" yelled Viren. "You sent them, didn't you?!"

"Not entirely no, but I might have tipped off some people that you were making a fuss. C'mon Virey it's Christmas! Where's your holiday cheer?" said Tony smugly. "Anyone up for Jingle Bells?"

[revolutionhawk]

"Figures."

Shay is not impressed one bit at Viren's excuse villain plot and a horse suddenly escalating the situation, what a surprise.

... Also he's ignoring Tony's indirect quip.

"Any other kids waiting to step up and pretend they know what they're doing?"

[luckydragonsfoot]

Well, suffice to say Yuume is staring.

First at Viren and Spiderman and then-

A dejected Katsuya is slowly looking back at Tony. "S...she doesn' have.."

Cue choking. "Y- You had her registered without a pokeball!?" Well forget that then!!

"Nyhhh...Kaseri...y' gotta cut it out, y' weren' s'pposed to make moves like tha'..."

"I suspect she doesn't care..."

[hashtagparkerluck]

Great. Just great. Exactly what he needed. Mr Stark to see him make a complete fool of himself. Shit. He's way too close to this guy and it started to be uncomfortable before they were even this well acquainted. What options does he have?

He shoots a web off to the side to try and pull himself free and luckily for him, it works! The only problem is that Viren starts to come with and part of his shirt seems to have ripped making things just that much more uncomfortable.

"S-Sorry! I didn't mean to!" He calls out as he swings away and lands somewhere behind Tony.

[blue_ice]

Oh, so he's still the same Jou. For a hot minute there Kaiba had been worried he'd become competent. Kaiba sighed, winced at the scene before him, and stepped up beside him.

"I was going to attempt negotiations, but it looks like we blew that up."

[fallers_npcs]

"You're quite right negotiations have broken down!" raged Viren, ripping himself free of the stuffed bear, chunks of his shirt hanging from his tattered frame as he hopped to his feet.

"If you are all quite ready, I have my rights and I've got my ways of forcing you out of my store! Revengers Assemble!"

Wait what?

In an instant, five men dropped down from the top floor in superhero landings flanked by two massive pokemon, a Magmar and a Electivire. "Ho!" Exclaimed Mad Magmar. "looks like we're in for a Ho Ho Holiday Bash!

"Right you are." said Mr. Electric. "Beating up chumps is our specialty."

The other three released a Polywrath, Alolan Muk and a Alolan Golem as Viren laughed, having fetched a shirt thank god.

"Tell you what," boasted Viren. "If you beat them, I'll look the other way for this slight. If you don't, I'll have you ALL ARRESTED FOR TRESPASSING!"

[hashtagparkerluck]

Spider-Man just watches as event unfold before shooting his webs up to get back up on the wall where Shelob is. She makes a noise of annoyance at him.

"Revengers? Are you serious? Dude. At least try to sound original and shame on you for that pun that was just so weak I don't even wanna be seen talking to you." Peter shakes his head in disappoint.

"I'd say you're getting coal but you're into that." He fires a web at one to try and tie them all up. "Come one Shelob, we've got work to do!"

[luckydragonsfoot]

Suffice to say as Kaiba approaches, Katsuya is mostly groaning in his hands. "Maaaaan...Why'd she have t' have such good aim..." He groans, only to freeze.

A vision of red. Of yellow. Of-

Oh they're here now actually, so they should move.

"Kaseri!" He shouts, giving a proper order as he bolts up, "Get 'm Confused!"

Well now it's a fight! And Kaseri is more than eager to play- with a strange and warbling cry, psychic power blasts forward in hopes of not only leaving damage, but confusion as well.

Yuume meanwhile shakes her head, focusing on the battle just as quick. "Tch. I have no doubt you would have brought it to this level as is..! Hatti! Audino!" she shouts, only to sigh as her Indeedee follows as well. "And...You, I suppose... ....GO! Misty Terrain!" she starts, Audino setting the field. "Hatti- follow with Disarming Voice..!" she orders second, grabbing her Indeedee's hand as she melts into shadow and coats herself with armor.

"You, however, come with me..." Viren fights dirty after all, so she wants to get a closer eye on what follows while the fight is on.

[revolutionhawk]

Rather than his Hawlucha, Shay actually opted for sending out his Cramorant. The fact that the bird lifts off just above most people's heads doesn't end up helping much within the crowded space-

Because suddenly the horse fires off that Confusion attack and Scuttle squawks in pain and alarm upon being caught up in the blast, then it takes a dive until the rush Shay makes to catch about 40 pounds of scruffy cormorant- right after also being thrown to the floor again by the shockwave- look super cool and effortless.

"It's alright, I'm not mad at you. If you've figured out Aqua Ring by now, use it."

Concerning a certain IDIOT that he's glaring at now, just wait until this mess is over...

[nothing_can_stop_me]

“WAAAAAUGH!” Della yelped, clutching her head. “Excuse me?! Do you mind?!” She shouted towards whoever attacked everyone. “Gonna have a headache here... and that gives me an idea!”

With that, she tosses a Pokeball, releasing Donald Psyduck out. “Donald, they’re gonna ruin Christmas if we don’t stop them!”

“What?! Why those no-good...!” The Psyduck warbled before charging at the Mad Magmar with Fury Swipes. Della, however, had plans as she ran over to Viren. “Hey! Hey, you! I wanna talk to you!”

[withoutcontrolofmyself]

Kaiba’s Goomy wails as chaos unfolds. However, the little dragon is a lot more composed than Kaiba and reacts on their own. The Goomy draws in a deep breath before shooting out the most powerful water gun it can muster towards the Magmar.

Wes admittedly had gotten distracted. While everyone else was arriving, his baby Morpeko had jumped out of his pocket and retrieved a toy. It was a cheap plastic one, but a toy none the less. It actually reminded Wes of something he had a long time ago...

And suddenly Viren is yelling. Right, he had just threatened him and apparently the others were too. Wes turns and frowns as he looks at the opponents. Right... a battle.

Paying no attention to the chaos Jou is unfolding, Wes springs to action. He draws his Pokeball, figuring that Morpeko wasn’t suited for right now and the small darling needed rest.

“Koffing! Use sludge! Defeat that Electivire!”

As Koffing swirls and spits out its foul gunk, Wes makes for a break towards Mr. Electric. He sees wrestlers and he doesn’t see it as a double battle. This meant they could fight too, right? Viren did say he had to beat them...

[fallers_npcs]

The only response could be controlled chaos. Almost.

The first salvo of webbing was grabbed by Electivire as he swung Spider-man around like a whip, and tossed him away as the Confusion struck everyone on the field, dizzying several but then the Misty Terrain cleared everything up real fast.

But then the Disarming Voice accidentally struck a podium with active microphones and it ricocheted, reverberating out from speakers surrounding the room and slammed back into the Disarming Voice cancelling it out.

Aqua Ring Heals for a decent amount!

Mad Magmar found himself being charged down with Fury Swipes and the pro wrestler yelped in surprise but his Magmar intercepted with Fire Punch which knocked Donald back several steps.

And finally Koffing's Sludge splashed against the Electivire's Thunderbolt, the Thunderbolt crashing right through it and striking Koffing while Mr. Electric decided that since Wes was meeting him, he would attempt to Clothesline him with a failure to that maneuver.

Tony in the meantime, was protecting some presents, escorting some shoppers out of the area, and sighing. "Can you people take this outside?" he demanded.

[hashtagparkerluck]

"Wuh-oh." Peter gets out before he's whipped around like a doll except he's fairly certain dolls get treated better than this! He tries to regain control of the situation but he's suddenly feeling extremely dizzy from all the back and forth. He lets go of the web strand and braces himself for impact only to feel himself crash into someone rather than something.

Knowing his luck, it's probably Mr Stark. "Ugh... I don't feel so well..." He whines, trying to get his head to stop spinning. For someone with near perfect equilibrium he sure gets motion sickness easy enough.


Shelob, meanwhile is joining the fight and aims a poison sting attack right at Electivire.

[luckydragonsfoot]

"NHHG-"

Suffice to say Katsuya didn't expect that. Katsuya didn't expect that at all. Kaseri is prancing around excitedly, and the guys right next to him are groaning and shouting and glaring and he hates this.

"Khh...hh...What th' hell..!" The ponyta isn't prancing anymore. "Tha' ain't what we did in th' forest...don't look proud!" His shouting isn't especially loud- it's more severe than loud, because as much as he's upset it's also an animal, kind of, and well.

He sort of...gets that animals don't 100% understand. Not really. At the very least Kaseri seems more like a large baby and...

Dammit. "We shouldn' even be doin' this, Kaseri..! We weren' supposed t' fight, an' it ain't good that we are..! An' hurtin everyone around y'..." To be entirely fair on both sides, in the forest there weren't allies to hit. But all the same, one shouldn't be so pleased with themselves right after that sort of backfire.

Not at all. "Nnn...Nniiihihi..?"

Katsuya's expression is flat. "We can't afford t' screw up-" he insists, digging out some berries from his pocket and blindly handing them over to the ones beside him- they need it, after what his pokemon did. Even if it means he has none after. "So take th's seriously..!"

"Nihi...Nniihhh..." The ponyta blinks- not necessarily upset, but at least contemplative... And then, tapping the ground anxiously, she turns and allows her tail to shine. "NNNIIIIIIHHHHH!"

"NY- WHAT-" Well great, there she goes with Iron Tail, charging toward Alolan Golem. The magmortar, meanwhile, seems to have been Struck HARD...probably by the Very pleased looking Goomy that Katsuya just handed a berry. Watergun. Super effective. Extreme damage.

"Heh...good job squirt..." At least someone's praising them.

Yuume meanwhile has...well. An entirely other idea. Disarming Voice didn't quite get amplified and redirected the way she'd hoped. No instead it cancelled itself out. Worse, this is the absolute shittiest place for a battle...they need to get out of here, and she needs time to formulate a plan for that. Fortunately her Audino knows where to carry it off in her absence. Glowing the brilliant pink of Secret Power, Audino charges for Poliwrath...

But behind her, Hatti the Hatenna is getting rather anxious. Disarming Voice didn't do anything, and that was sort of what she was supposed to use. But nothing happened??? Nothing happened...

So Hatti, tiny and scared and unsure, panics a bit, instead looking up toward the very large and very mean looking revengers and-

"H...HaaaAAATTEEEEEEEE!!"

That's not Disarming Voice. That is Psybeam, and god only knows which of the baddies she even hit.

(They really, really should get outta here.)

[revolutionhawk]

After Jou hands over a healing berry snack to his bird, Shay regards the teen with a bit less of a withering look and sends the waterfowl up back into the air.

"Being in close quarters like this cuts our options down..." And he doesn't like it. "There. Use Pluck."

He points out the Poliwrath and motions for what Scuttle should additionally do, which they follow to the letter- though it seems their target managed to see the incoming bird and the Cramorant is unceremoniously tossed into a tree.

Shay cannot hold back a bitter and frustrated sigh as while there are some good hits going on against the "Revengers", overall it's still a hell of a mess.

[nothing_can_stop_me]

Della got the berry from Jou only to watch Donald get slugged by the Magmar. Thankfully, being a water type meant that it didn't hurt too much. On the other hand, it made its headache worse.

"Aaaaugh, my head." he groaned, clutching his head, causing Della to stop and run back for the Psyduck.

"Oh, nonononono!" she cried out, slamming the berry down his beak. "No super psychic powers things!"

"Waaaaaaaugh!" Donald yelped as the headache got worse.

"Oh, no! Everyone take cover! Psychic duck with a headache!" Della shouted... tossing Donald at the villains as it went to use Water Gun, shooting the Psyduck skyward and drowning the villains as it did.

"DUCK AND COVER!" And she hid behind a table. "...that's not a psychic move."

[blue_ice]

Why was this happening? What did he do to deserve any of this? (A lot of things, actually.) He was thrown by Jou's wayward blast, and landed in such a heap that his coat trapped him at an extremely awkward angle on the ground. All anyone heard from him for the last while was some muffled shouting, but thankfully his small goo dragon was smart enough to act on her own.

He finally wriggled out of his coat just in time to see Jou feeding Goomy, and...ah. Okay. He'll allow it this time, Jou.

And he finally stood, absolutely seething with anger. It radiated from him for a few moments, before sharpening into determination.

"Keep going, Goomy! Help it!"

But he was still off balance and flustered, so despite his best effort, he...wasn't really heard...